Back to Work!

(I know, I should have moved to the other blog by now, but I haven’t. I will soon, though).

Anyhow, yesterday was officially my back to work day! I can’t say I was dreading it; after all, I had CHOSEN to work here, as I recently declined a Project Manager position with Delmarva. I just couldn’t go back there, even though there were some very logical reasons why I should take the job (e.g. money, skills, etc.). But I hated the work while I was there, and it’s stupid to think that would have changed just because it’s been years later, you know?

Coming back wasn’t hard. Well, of course I was sad, because I didn’t want to leave Kojo, and after all, waking up and throwing on some lounge wear, without the stress of leaving for work, was divine! It makes me want to be a stay-at-home mom, or, better yet, a work-at-home mom, where I get to stay home during the day, and then we switch off and the evenings are for working. That is perfect.

Yesterday went okay, but it definitely wasn’t as warm of a welcome as I could have received. Everyone was courteous, yes, but it just magnified the fact that no one here (except Hakimah) is my friend. These people didn’t even get me a freakin’ CARD, for Christ’s sake, to say, “Congratulations!” when Kojo was born. If that wasn’t enough to let me know that no one here cares, I don’t know what is.

I have to keep reminding msyelf that I am here for myself, not for anyone else. I am here because it’s not a stressed environment, there is some autonomy, and I like not carrying work home. That wouldn’t have been the case with Delmarva, for sure. This place is more laid back. Yes, there is the whole contract thing up in the air and not knowing who is going to hold the contract come this July or less, but I’m willing to accept a little uncertainty if I know I can sleep well at night without all the drama of carrying work home.

So, I am here….

Pumping is going well. I was surprised to have found a spot here (actually, TWO spots!) for nursing moms, which is awesome. I may have to supplement with formula because of the long day for me between the commute and having to walk 15 minutes to my car and such. But que sera, sera. He will be fine.

I’ve been doing a lot of blogging, on my other blog, From House….To Home. I started it a year ago, in hopes of being able to document what we’re doing with our house. But I have learned that women are actually making MONEY off of these things, and I have decided that I want to try to make money, as well. So, let’s do it. Let’s try to make money blogging.

I’ve also been loving on the thrift stores. On maternity leave, I was there at least once a week! I have found awesome things, and have tried my hand at selling some of these things online, on eBay, like shoes and stuff. It’s hard to make money selling little things; you really need to sell big-ticket items, and it’s better to sell furniture on Craigslist. I nearly made $110 off of the buffet table that I bought and listed on Craigslist, but after some thought, I loved it too much to sell it! But it proved to me that yes, I can surely buy and sell used furniture, and make some money from it. You never know, maybe even enough to earn a partial living, while maybe being able to keep Ohene and Kojo at home!

Speaking of Ohene, OMG, that boy is so funny, and so GROWN, for having just turned 2 years old! The other day he was crying over wanting a Z-Bar (a type of granola-ish bar). I told him no, because he hadn’t eaten his dinner. After 10 minutes of crying and whining for it, he asked Kwasi to do it. Well, I don’t think Kwasi had been paying much attention while in the kitchen, and just opened it for him with no second thought. Wouldn’t you know that little slick ass walked over to me and hesistantly smiled at me and said, “Daddy open it. Ha ha.” OMG! What?! “Ha ha”?? He was throwing it in my face that he got what he wanted!!! We must seriously put a stop to that, because he just learned that all he has to do is go from one parent to the next to get what he wants. NOT good.

Kojo is doing well. He smiles at everything I say!! He’s so sweet! He loves sleeping in our bed, and is pretty much sleeping through the night, with me nursing him about once per night. He’s got to be about 15 lbs by now! He turned 12 weeks tomorrow. I can’t believe it. Time really is flying by. I know that is so trite, but it’s true. He’s batting at things a bit, and loves to coo. And he’s getting so chunky! I love his little fat thighs 🙂 Kwabena and Ohene love him so much. Kwabena, who doesn’t like to kiss people, will kiss on that baby so much. It’s pretty cute. 🙂

Kwabena is doing well. Report cards just came out last week, and although he had some “N”s for “Not there yet” on working independently and being able to follow directions, he got some pretty great things, too. Like the fact that Kindergarteners are to be reading at a Level 4 when they leave Kindergarten, and he actually STARTED at a Level 6. He’s now at a Level 13, at least assessment, which is awesome! I’m so proud of him!! If only we could work on his attention span…. and being able to follow directions. His teacher also noted that Kwabena needs to learn to WALK instead of RUNNING. OMG…..he’s always been that way. Too crazy, huh?! I almost wonder if he has a “touch” of ADHD, and how we get that assessed. He does have a problem getting his work done in class. He needs constant prodding from the teacher. And I have noticed when we’re doing his Erector set that he has about 15-20 minutes of good attention when we do it, and then he starts to lose focus. I guess something I should bring up to his pediatrician.

Other than that, the clan is doing well!

Kwasi is good. I’m sure he’s glad we’re out of the house now, so that we’re not interrupting his beloved conference calls. LOL At least now he will be able to go on his afternoon walks, hopefully, since we’re not there to interfere.

The worst thing, however, is that a week and a half ago, my cousin Seth’s wife, Beth, died in a car accident 🙁 She was on life support, and her 5 month old baby didn’t survive becasue she was only at 22 weeks, and there was nothing they could do. It was horrible, and sad. I went to visit in the hosital in Baltimore, and he really appreciated that, which makes me feel good that I went. The baby had been born stillborn, and they had placed him in her arms, which is where he was last night at the viewing; they were buried together this morning. Horrible, horrible.

I know it sounds trite, but you really could have your whole life turned upside down in a moment. It makes you wonder how you’re spending (or wasting) your life, and why aren’t you doing what you want given the fact that our time is so limited. Like, why do I feel like I have to sit here at this job….at some desk… for 8 frickin’ hours of my day (10, if you add in commute time), just to earn a paycheck? I know we need money to live, but it’s all a choice. We could give it all up if we wanted to, just so we could all be together, or at least, spend more time together. Because, this is time we’re not getting back. It’s gone, forever.

I think about Kwasi working in the shop on the weekends, and how we don’t have normal family time the way normal families do. All for what?? To pay for daycare? To pay bills? What about the time we’re losing, that we’re never regaining? At the end of our lives, we will look back and regret this, I’m sure of it.

We’ll regret that we didn’t make family a priority.

We spend time being so “connected” to our computers, on Facebook and other social media, with no real CONNECTION at all. And what’s it all for? Cheap entertainment??? We could be loving each other, or doing things that make our life meaningful. But instead, we waste it trying to impress people online, to make them “Like” us and “Like” what we have to say, when really, who gives a shit if people “Like” us??

Anyhow…I could go on and on….But I’m seriously about to fall asleep, and it’s only 3:29 p.m. and I’m at my desk. NOT a good look…..