Second Child Syndrome. It’s a real phenomenon, people. Just Google it and you’ll see (check out this funny article about SCS). Tons of parents out there experiencing what I am experiencing–a lack of excitement (or so it seems) for the second child.
I was thinking about it this morning–no one really makes a fuss over Ohene, except for Kwabena, because for HIM, this is HIS first time experiencing a baby. But everyone else has already “been there, done that.”
I can count on one hand the number of times that Kwasi has talked to Ohene; however, with Kwabena, he would always exclaim, “Hhheeeelllloooo, bbbaaabbbyyy! Are you iiiinnnn therrree??” This time, he may swipe his hand across my belly quickly in acknowledgment, but then move on to something else.
Same goes for me. I used to talk to Kwabena all the time while pregnant. I would tell him what I was doing, where I was going, how I loved him so much, etc. etc. And now, Ohene doesn’t get nearly as much verbal interaction from me (although he gets much poking and prodding and “playing” with me, LOL). I do speak to him, too, and tell him I love him, and am looking forward to meeting him in December. But the amount of talking isn’t nearly as much as with Kwabena.
I don’t have a good relationship with Bee (my sister). We rarely talk anymore, for various reasons, like the fact that she works weekends and isn’t in my hometown when I go to visit Mom on the weekends. I have only seen her for a few minutes here and there over the last year or more. But regarding this pregnancy, she’s maybe inquired a couple times (by text message!!), “How are you feeling?” I don’t think she’s ever even seen an ultrasound picture of Ohene. Mom hasn’t seemed as involved, either.
I think it’s because everyone has already been through this before–the excitement of a new baby. Now here comes Ohene, and although I know he will be loved just as much, hardly anyone is fawning over the pregnancy.
…..That is, except Kwabena!
It touches my heart the way he will sometimes kiss my belly and say, “I want to say hi to the baby” and then coo at him “Hhhiii, bbabbby….” as he rubs his head gently against my belly. Even times when I least expect it, like when I am climbing down from his bed at night after reading him a story, he will reach up to my belly and kiss Ohene and hug him. How awesome is that?!
I realized this morning that for everyone else, they’ve already experienced us having a child before; it’s nothing new for them this time. However, with Kwabena, it’s new! And he’s excited to have a brother!
He’s told me that when the baby comes, he’s not going to be in a stroller anymore (although he usually isn’t). He said “I’m going to carry the baby.” He’s told me that he wants the baby to sleep with him in his bed. LOL How cute is that? 🙂 He’s pointed out to me that he isn’t going to run through the house when the baby is here, because he doesn’t want to hurt the baby. Awwww……I think he’s going to be a great big brother! And although everyone else seems to be glazing over this pregnancy, Kwabena has definitely taken special notice of his impending “big brotherhood” and is very excited about it. And it makes me happy that at least someone is paying special attention to Ohene!
I know it will all change when the baby comes. Of course we will all love the baby and fawn all over him. Maybe he won’t have *as* many pictures taken… and his baby book is a little less filled out (but it’s still filled out!! I made a point to do that!)….he will be well-received into our home, and we will love him and care for him.
Maybe I will do things differently, maybe I won’t. Who knows? But I know that I am anxiously looking forward to Baby Ohene and the added joy he will bring to our family! 🙂
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