So Little Time…

Being a working mom is hard.

For some moms, being a working mom is hard because of guilt-ridden feelings for leaving their precious child with a daycare provider for 9 to 10 hours per day. But for me, the hardest part is being able to manage my time effectively while having time for it all, including myself. It’s a give or take situation.

No matter what time I wake in the morning, I find it challenging to leave the house any earlier than 7:30 a.m. Yesterday I woke at 4 a.m. (wide awake) and decided to stay up and do my motherly duties (i.e. pack a nutritious meal for Kwabi, clean dishes, pick out Kwabi’s clothes, iron the clothes, etc.). Any organized mom could tell me that these motherly duties should be done the night before, but considering that they take at least an hour, it seems ridiculous to spend 1 hour of my free time in the evening doing something that could be done in the morning when I would have to be getting ready for work anyways.

So the challenge is that I wake around 5:30 a.m…….rush to the kitchen to prepare breakfast and lunch for myself and Kwabi…….while praying that Kwabi doesn’t wake up before I am done (or else my little man will cling to me like Glad Wrap, and how challenging is that to try to pack lunch with one arm while holding a half-sleeping toddler in the other arm becaues he refuses to let go of his beloved Mommy)…….Then sprint to the laundry basket of clean, wrinkled clothes that had been thrown inside with the broken promise that tonight would be the night they get folded and put away after sitting for nearly a week–yeah, right!)…….in desperate search for an outfit for Kwabi to wear (poor child wears the same outfits over and over)…..”Dammit, why can’t I find matching toddler socks?!”…..Then passing Kwabi off to Kwasi, in hopes that Kwabi will cooperate enought to let Daddy provide care.

Oh, but then he prefers Mommy to dress him, do his hair, brush his teeth……Poor daddy, thanks for trying!

….I make a mad dash to the bathroom to shower, run a razor over my legs just in case it matters that day, and quickly do my hair. Thank God for Extra Hold gel and curly hair that dries quickly into a somewhat cute style with very little intervention of my own.

(How do some Mom’s even have time to style their hair??)

….Frustrated, I go back and forth to my closet, looking for something to wear, and I swear I’ve been rockin’ the same three pairs of dress pants for the last several months. After changing a couple of times, I think I’m finally ready to leave! Kwabi insists that Mommy carries him downstairs instead of Daddy. So Kwasi is left to carry bags.

Off they go, father and son, to daycare, which is a huge help that I don’t have to take him. The daycare provider and I get along very well, and it usually means a 15-20 minute conversation that results in further delaying my dreaded commute up a packed Route 29 South.

Driving to work is quite calm, as I listen to music or The Gayle King Show on the Oprah channel (gotta love XM radio!)

Thankfully I work at a great, relaxed place with a gym next door. This job has its benefits!!

At the end of the work day, coming home, by the time I walk through the door around 6 p.m., I drop my things and start my Second Job (all working moms have second jobs that start when they get home). I rush to the kitchen to clean up any remaining messes (thankfully Kwasi will do dishes for me during the day since he works from home!)……poke my head in the cabinets, fridge, and freezer, searching for any ingredients that could be quickly whipped up into a healthy, hearty meal for my family….

Meanwhile, Kwabi either entertains himself while playing outside on our little balcony with his cars and trucks, or plays with me while I tickle and chase him for a bit, regrettably while having to multi-task cooking or cleaning……

….And then it’s bath-time about 7:30 p.m. Kwasi and I sometimes trade off: he bathes Kwabi while I clean up the kitchen, or vice versa. But sometimes Kwabi prefers me to bathe him, so I am sometimes left with doing all chores and childcare, particularly if Kwasi is busy working.

About 8:45 p.m. Kwabi’s ready for bed. I usually fall alsleep with him, waking at 10:30 p.m. in a groggy, sleepy fog, unable to bring myself to go do all the things I know I should do to prepare for tomorrow (i.e. pack lunches, iron clothes, etc.). Instead, I climb into bed, with teeth unbrushed, face unwashed, and barely putting on pajamas, and sink into bed, welcoming a fitful sleep, while lamenting about all the things I won’t get getting done that evening.

And the next day, we get up to do it all over again.

I love being a mom. It’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. We are blessed to have Kwabi! But being a working mom, especially when I lack necessary organizational skills in order to manage it all, is tough. What is hard is having to accept that when you’re a working mom, you are always on the go, multi-tasking dinner, bills, cleaning, etc., while trying to give your child and husband your undivided attention…….

You give up a lot–time with your child…..time to devote to the activities and hobbies that you love and that energize you, etc., all for the need to put food on the table, pay bills, and for some, continue to advance their careers.

I’m sure stay-at-home moms have it hard, too. At some point, they’ve got to get tired of playing “choo-choo” allllll day. LOL But when you’re a working mom, it feels like you’re always racing against the clock–racing to get to work, racing to get home from work, racing to prepare dinner within a reasonable time, racing to get your child in bed so they get a full-night’s sleep, etc.

I believe that part-time moms have the ideal life–they get time with their family, yet still get the benefit of advancing their careers, socializing with adults, time to veg out in their cars to and from work, etc. And maybe they still find time to fit in their hobbies and extracurricular activities.

Anyhow….It’s my goal to figure out how to be a little more organized so that I don’t feel like I am racing through life, trying to create enough time for this, that, and the other.

I want to be a mom that manages her family life exceptionally well, but also have time carved out for fun, activities, and hobbies that further enrich my life beyond my title of “Mom” and “Wife.”