I just checked the blog and realized my last post was a week ago! I really don’t feel like posting tonight, but considering that 7 whole days have pasted since I posted, I really cannot let another night go without at least a quick catch-up 🙂
Ohene had his 1-month check-up today! The little piglet is now 10 lbs, 4 oz! Quite a jump from the 7 lbs, 7 oz he was on December 15th 🙂 Who ever said breast milk was second best to formula?! I checked Kwabena’s 1-months stats, and he was 10 lbs 6 oz, but was 8 lbs 4 oz at birth. So Ohene has definitely closed that small gap! Today Ohene measured 21.5″ long, up a whole inch from his 20.5″ at birth. Compared to Kwabena’s 21 and 3/4″ at his 1-month check up, it looks like my boys are on the same growth curve!
The appointment went well. But I was totally grossed out when this new dr. in the practice had the nerve to stick his pinky finger in Ohene’s mouth–UN-GLOVED!!!!–when examining him! Ohene was crying, and I wasn’t sure if the finger thing was to calm him, or if he was checking the inside of his mouth. I feel bad that I was shocked into silence, because, after all, he could have had germs on his hands! Maybe I didn’t say anything because I had seen the dr. toweling off his hands when he came into the room, that made me believe he had just washed his hands, but still….. I vowed to never see this dr. again. UGH.
After the appointment, I went to Kohl’s and shopped for 5 new pair of pants/jeans for Kwabena, while Ohene napped in the stroller. I picked up a couple new sets of workout clothes for myself, ready to get on my grind, and to lose this frickin’ baby weight. Total, I spent way too much money–money I don’t have. But what can you do when your pre-schooler has holes in EVERY pair of jeans he owns, and you need new workout clothes?
Here’s one of the outfits I bought. I took a lovely FRONT shot and decided to post this one, since you can’t see my PPP (Post-Partum Pouch) as much in this picture:
Can I just say that I am NOT happy with the back-fat rolls that I acquired while pregnant?! UGH….. And the fact that I am so weak that I can’t even do a few boy push-ups without feeling like I’m lifting a ton. When I was in shape earlier in 2009 when I got pregnant, I could easily do 20-25 boy push-ups–no sweat. *SIGH*……Patience, Serena…Patience. I’ve at least started walking, with and without Ohene, a couple times already, for an hour at a time, so it’s a start, right? Oh–and I’ve started doing some push-ups (girl) and sit-ups again.
Anyhow….back to my day…..So I shopped….came home and had Chipotle with Kwasi….nursed the baby, played with him, chatted with Morning….And then we went to pick up Kwabena from daycare.
Yesterday he had a tough day. I don’t know what his problem was, but this was the first time Miss Marilyn had to call me during the day with behavioral problems. He was running while, not following directions, throwing things at other people (in his too-playful-but-it’s-really-not-cute-anymore way), and just being tiresome. After the call, and a good nap, he was fine. But he ended up with 2 bite marks from another kid, which he got after he playfully was biting on another kid that didn’t like that sort of play.
And tonight, when we got home from Kwasi’s mom’s house, and ready to put our pizza in the oven, Kwabena kept asking me to play….to do a puzzle….He’s starved for my attention. Even when I GIVE him attention, it’s not enough. He wants more. He told me he wants “the most” attention, which is nearly impossible with a demanding newborn.
Kwasi criticized me tonight for taking Kwabena into the bedroom before bedtime and reading him a couple books. He says I shouldn’t make separate time for Kwabena, because I won’t always have that ability, and then what?? In my opinion, Kwabena deserves that time. You can’t expect a 3.5 year old to get a new sibling after being the ONLY one for that long, and just be happy with sharing me with everyone else. He deserves some one-on-one time, and I’m going to give it to him whenever I can. I also am going to make sure that he knows there are times he needs to entertain himself so that I can do other things. But yes, he deserves “Mommy and Kwabena” time, the way Ohene gets that one-on-one time when Kwabena is at daycare during the day. It’s only fair to both boys.
Kwasi had the nerve to tell me that I “abandoned” Ohene tonight in order to spend time with Kwabena, which is the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard. He frustrates me with his conceptions of parenthood. He just doesn’t GET it. He’s an able-bodied parent who can rock Ohene just as much as I can. So if Kwabena is hungry for time with Mommy at the end of the day, and Ohene is crying because he wants to go to sleep, rocking him to sleep is definitely a task that Daddy can step in to help with when Mommy is needed elsewhere.
That’s the hardest part of parenting two kids–balancing the attention between the two of them. After all, Kwabena’s got wants and needs, and so does Ohene. Some of Ohene’s needs I must address immediately (like hunger). Other needs of Ohene’s (e.g. wanting to be rocked) is something that Kwasi is completely capable of doing. And vice versa. There are things that Kwasi is capable of doing with Kwabena, and other things that Mommy is needed. It’s a fine balance.
I guess we’ll figure it out….Or will we continue this ridiculous choosing of sides, criticisms, and unbalanced life?
So….this post turned into a longer post than expected. But it has been a week, after all.
Maternity leave is going very well, but sooo fast. Each day blends into the next, going too fast. I find that I am enjoying this maternity leave more than I did with Kwabena (the beginning weeks, that is). I remember being bored with Kwabena’s leave. I guess I did nothing but sit on the sofa, nursing with sore nips, spending money during trips to Target, and having each day blend in to the next. Now, however, I am filling my time when Ohene is sleeping with (too much) computer time, knitting, reading, etc. I’m enjoying this! I realized the other day, if we only have 2 kids, this could be the last time I am able to have this much time off at a given time!!
Hmmm….what else is new…? I’m sure more things to discuss…..Oh, yes….How Miss Marilyn wanted me to sit and observe Kwabena doing his writing yesterday. She had concerns about how he was writing his numbers (not in the right sequence, etc.). Are you kidding me? She even had the nerve to mention how autistic kids write things wrong. Umm…Definitely ridiculous the way she focuses her attention on things like this.
Her goal is to prepare her kids for school. They do schoolwork (not a lot) a couple days a week or so. She pointed out to me yesterday how Kwabena will do his schoolwork if she is sitting next to him, or watching him, or praising him. But the minute she walks away, even to test him to see what he will do, he stops doing his work. Although she started the conversation with saying how she wanted me to observe HOW he was writing (e.g. his grip, which pencil he should use, etc.), she said her focus is on wanting him to be independent at this age–to be able to sit independently and do schoolwork, or some other work task, without needing her sitting right there.
She makes it sound like when she brings things to a parent’s attention, if they don’t take her observations seriously, then the parent has problems with the kid later. She always mentions one other kid in the daycare who recently left this school year for kindergarten, and how she would tell the mom this…and that…about the kid’s behavior…and about his pencil grip…and about his skills, etc., and because the mom made excuses, the child is having problems.
So, I never really know how seriously to take Miss Marilyn’s criticisms. Are these things that a 3.5 year old should be able to do? Is it just something to take note of? Are these things something to start working on? (e.g. independence at doing school work)? Who knows……
Well, I could go on forever….But it’s 11:15 p.m. and I’m TIRED! I was falling asleep tonight while reading books to Kwabena! I should nap, since Ohene will be up soon to nurse and be changed.
**YAWN**
Night!
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